The Word Left Unspoken

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The heaven was in bliss and so was many around the globe,But certainly not me and all around me.The clouds leaked the ultimatum of truth drop by drop and those raindrops shaved the withering and pale face of mine but none around me cared about it.My dad,with his out-of-date repulsive mustache and beard, weeping around me defined the most vulnerable individual present at this small,moderate and nominal funeral.My mom who would’ve been a strong competition to him, unfortunately was laid at the nearby hospital bed,pinned to the memoirs of acts I’ve given her.Peterson,whom i dupely call,Pete,whom with i share the the overhaul of my everything,my best pal,my finest companion was nowhere to be found.He may be at the Emirates,in the joy of watching Arsenal,the joy he couldn’t risk for attending his best friends death funeral,he wouldn’t risk that even for his love.Whatever that is,my delight to watch him in that drape because He’d once told me that he hated black more than hell and seeing him in that top brass look would be the mojo mockery of the year.


The wind was taking its pace as the perpetual scenario of a late winter continues and i was getting desperate,not because of the disgusting wind(oh well,i can’t feel it now),not because of the blatant weeping show running around me,and not because of the turned up good-bye-my-dear attitude booming over and definitely ,100%,not because of the scintillating DJ show happening two blocks away.Its just i’m missing someone who should be standing beside me with that grave look in her brown eyes.But out of fortune.she’s not here.The first ring “ding dong” ring of the church bell led my mind back to the day i saw her for the first time,oh i’m sorry not to that day, that’s a bit stinky.So,to the day i met her the 5th or 6th or 7th time,i don’t remember.That day she smiled at me for saving her blushes by offering my innocence  to substitute her guilty  in case of a library damage act.I never knew whether it was a smile of thanking or a smile of “i took advantage of you” kind,but it was all i needed,it worked.


The church bell struck for the second time resisting my thoughts to come abroad,back to the present.This time i feel the heat of slap i got from athletic, stout dad,mm,what’s the need of keeping pride anymore,it was from her bulky ex.I couldn’t help it as its a story of debauchery.My lines of love was sent to her but that girl revealed it with her her friends,And i wonder how girls couldn’t read the tight line “Meant only for you”.Anyway it all happened and that was it.


The third bell ring rise me to the day i said her those words ‘I LOVE YOU”,with my head held high,chest put forward and in the most adamant and compact voice. mm ..oh you got it,i’m sorry again,i lied again.It was more like a pleading,more like begging for love and she dared a husky look on me and went away.She didn’t answer me but i knew for my heart,she do have an answer.
The fourth bell ring reminds me of the blunder i did to lose my life.Well, i don’t want to be the donkey in the hat,so don’t ask me how i died,it’s out of concept.Now i’m died, lied in the casket,ready to be buried.But before i’m led into the path of oblivion,i need her to see me and wanted her to know that  i died in misery out of not seeing her.My funeral was ending and i wasn’t looking forward to the diversion of doors to hell and heaven.I knew already,where i’ll be headed..So i closed my eyes and waited for the end of my frustrating life.I closed myself completely and tried to focus in…..,in nothing.

Oh, sorry,i think i slept… 

It seems like its being ages since i shut my eyes,but when i opened my eyelids,the funeral was still celebrating my death.I lapsed my mind to the other side(of course i couldn’t turn my head) and I SAW HER..
I was inside the casket and only a small part of my face was revealed,so i can’t tell whether she wore black or not.She Stood with a bow head and placed a violet rose on the casket,above my chest.A tear drop fell into it and i knew her answer now..I felt like i’m the effervescent sun,the brisking river,the dashing snake,oh not snake,i hate snakes..And the thought dominated was the thought to live once again.


“NO”


She said in a pitch blank tone,a tone which favors he idea of  i-got-over-you kind.Without listening to the immoral language i used,she said “my answer for you was always a NO,I know its not the rundown to express this,but i always  tried to ignore you,but u didn’t swallow your pride ”.I’ve never called her anything apart love,darling,honey etc,but this time i called her a 5 letter word.You know,why i chose a five letter word,5 is a sum of 3(YES) and 2 (NO)..She gimmick ed me both at the same time. 
The rain was getting bitter and aggressive. She opened her umbrella(it was black) and said “i’m sorry for your death..and she walked away..yeah,that was the last nail in my coffin..
I heard from Pete at-last. Hearing from him always leave me WOW and this time it was no worse..aaaw,but the time was too naive and its how weird my misery is written-I Couldn’t Even say a goodbye to my Best Friend.And that moment i peeked through the small gap in front of me and saw him embracing her and comforting her…
How could i never knew” THAT BITCH was my BEST FRIEND’S LOVE”.

I yelled at my best..”STOP FRIGGING ME AROUND AND BURY ME,DAMNITTTT”.

And above all i knew,this funeral will never end,not so soon…!!  
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Gautam Sudev

Nothing descriptive.

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